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Become Ocean – John Luther Adams

Water trickling down a pipe or a drain. It feels like the swelling of something dark or of something that will become dark. Now lighter tones. Is spring being introduced? It goes on and on. Shit. Not a minute in yet, and I already want change. There it is. No, nothing has changed, or if it has, the change is so, so subtle that I do not notice it. I was wrong. There is change. A crescendo. Please change to something more interesting. It is doing the opposite of a crescendo now, a decay in the sound. I think decay is the right term. How about changing altogether to something with more rhythm? Asking for a friend. Getting more melodical, it feels as if someone is playing with water in the way water is portrayed in music if that makes sense. Probably not. In any case, the lights are also blue in the concert hall, and blue stands for water. Again, getting worked up. Now it just sounds dangerous. And not at all to my taste. Katzenmusik amplified, that is what it is. Disgusting. Please stop! Nine minutes in and the remaining 33 minutes feel like eternity. Where is the change? Basinski’s “Disintegration Loops“ come to mind. Similarly boring. There is no change, same old, same old. Twelve minutes in and I want to die. Thirty minutes to go. 14.5 minutes: spring is springing again but my mood has massively deteriorated since the first time I felt spring in the piece. I am tired after a quarter of an hour of this. Tired and bored. 42 minutes. Who can stomach that? The music has turned into a blurr, a trance-like existence. Around me, students are talking; I don’t blame them. If I could, I would take out my boring novel, and would entertain myself better that way, and hopefully forget the music. Instead, I am writing this. (And I will NOT listen to this again. Once is enough.) Definitely longer stretched loops. This sounds as if someone has composed the music to a fairytale dream sequence. I am definitely getting tired. Physically tired. And cold. And I want to put my head on the desk and go to sleep. Twenty minutes to go. I am trying to stay awake, it is hard to manage. Will it ever end? 18 minutes to go. I cannot distinguish anything anymore. It is all a blurr of boring music. They have a whole fucking orchestra and this is what they are producing?! Waste of time and space. Is that a xylophone at 26 minutes? Yes it is. I love the sound of xylophones (for about a minute) but even that cannot save this anymore. Too late, too late. I am floating in an ocean of boringness. 28 minutes. It is almost good now that it has almost stopped. Do not start again. Oh no, there it goes again. Why? What has humanity done to you, Adams, to deserve this? Were you bullied as a child? Is this your retribution? I get it. But please spare us. I checked my oxygen levels. I am surprised to find it at 99%. How can that be? It feels like all the oxygen has drained from my body at this point. 32 minutes in. Hell is probably a more pleasant place unless it means listening to Basinski and Adams 24/7. Minute 34: is there a change? Again, misled.  Only a slightly different version of Hell. No, worse! Katzenmusik is back in full force. 37 minutes and back to fantasy land. If had been sat in the audience, I would want to sit next to the exit in order to leave after ten minutes for an extended toilette break. And only return around this time. Oh my God! The end is nigh! Not at all in a Christian sense but in one of pure joy. 41 minutes. It is finally getting somewhere pleasant. Also, Taylor Swift is overrated.

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